Saturday, April 18, 2009
Main Entry:change the will> b: to make radically different : transform change human nature> c: to give a different position, course, or direction to
he told her that things were now different. how the houses near her home have changed, how their lives have changed, how radically different their timetables were now, how she has changed.
she? changed? she has always prided herself in being the most consistent. she has seen REAL change. girls who were all innocent now thick with make up sleeping with strange men. guys who used to be real sweethearts turn into alpha males fighting for the prettiest chick and jockeying for position in the group. little babies turning into bratty 4 year olds. she? she has, and probably will always be the same.
maybe her attitude has changed a little. maybe her fashion sense has been slightly more atuned to what everyone's wearing (not that it is bad). maybe her worldview has undergone some construction. maybe she speaks differently and has different priorities. but she's still the same what.
isn't she?
their relationship has changed. somehow, she cheated on him too many times. somehow, things are no longer the same. somehow, she changed along the way. it isn't good, or bad. it just isn't the same anymore.
and that's where trust comes in.
he doesn't know if he can trust her anymore. he loves her, yes, but maybe...and doubts flood him and drown the love that he has. he doesn't know who she is going out with, doing what, maybe kissing whoever she is out with, holding his hand, who knows. he is of the opinion that action speak louder than words, that it doesn't matter what you say, it's what you deliver.
then he thinks back to all the promises she made that has never been kept. the lies that she told. the times they have quarreled because this guy is too close. the times she cheated on him.
why doesnt he just dump her, she wonders.
not that she'd be delighted to jump into the arms of the next teresterone. not that she has been goading him into a break up. or that she doesn't love him anymore.
he just deserves someone better. someone he can TRUST.
she loves him, always have, always will. and sometimes she is inconsistent, but she knows that she loves him, and will die for him. honestly. she says things she doesn't mean, and her heart bled when he started crying after she screamed at him (her heart didn't literally bled. it was probably worse than that. but really, it is indescribable. you have to feel it to know what i'm trying to get at)
but yes, she doesn't know what to do anymore, how to make things better, and to start all over again.
what can she do?
- 1change
- Pronunciation:
- \ˈchānj\
- Function:
- verb
- Inflected Form(s):
- changed; chang·ing
- Etymology:
- Middle English, from Anglo-French changer, from Latin cambiare to exchange, probably of Celtic origin; akin to Old Irish camm crooked
- Date:
- 13th century
he told her that things were now different. how the houses near her home have changed, how their lives have changed, how radically different their timetables were now, how she has changed.
she? changed? she has always prided herself in being the most consistent. she has seen REAL change. girls who were all innocent now thick with make up sleeping with strange men. guys who used to be real sweethearts turn into alpha males fighting for the prettiest chick and jockeying for position in the group. little babies turning into bratty 4 year olds. she? she has, and probably will always be the same.
maybe her attitude has changed a little. maybe her fashion sense has been slightly more atuned to what everyone's wearing (not that it is bad). maybe her worldview has undergone some construction. maybe she speaks differently and has different priorities. but she's still the same what.
isn't she?
their relationship has changed. somehow, she cheated on him too many times. somehow, things are no longer the same. somehow, she changed along the way. it isn't good, or bad. it just isn't the same anymore.
and that's where trust comes in.
he doesn't know if he can trust her anymore. he loves her, yes, but maybe...and doubts flood him and drown the love that he has. he doesn't know who she is going out with, doing what, maybe kissing whoever she is out with, holding his hand, who knows. he is of the opinion that action speak louder than words, that it doesn't matter what you say, it's what you deliver.
then he thinks back to all the promises she made that has never been kept. the lies that she told. the times they have quarreled because this guy is too close. the times she cheated on him.
why doesnt he just dump her, she wonders.
not that she'd be delighted to jump into the arms of the next teresterone. not that she has been goading him into a break up. or that she doesn't love him anymore.
he just deserves someone better. someone he can TRUST.
she loves him, always have, always will. and sometimes she is inconsistent, but she knows that she loves him, and will die for him. honestly. she says things she doesn't mean, and her heart bled when he started crying after she screamed at him (her heart didn't literally bled. it was probably worse than that. but really, it is indescribable. you have to feel it to know what i'm trying to get at)
but yes, she doesn't know what to do anymore, how to make things better, and to start all over again.
what can she do?
what we could have been, 1:36 AM.
